Coward!

I need to focus on the what I need to do. Anything positive is good,but it has to be specific.

Vagueness brings excuses and thus laziness. Yes, I do try very hard to adopt a positive attitude in life, now. Inspiring reads like the secret, tuesdays with morrie, who move my cheese, the seven habits, etc never fails to aspire me to a better person, to spend the days in a more meaningful and effective way to yield a more productive me. I really do feel inspired by them.

Yet, I think my failure to fully adopt these pointers to a greater life is simply that I do not spell out my goals clearly. I refuse to see my goals in print.

No need to crack my head over the reason, for I know it damn well. Fear to fail. My own fear to

fail. I can write down everything, or almost everything that comes to mind, published or not, but yet, so far, in my entire short dwellings in this planet, and even shorter as a polluter here, I've not yet push and force myself to jot down what my goal or goals are, at various stages of my life.

I always analyze my other things, my work, my interactions, my characters, my happiness, my sadness, my surroundings, never my goals. I always get intrigue with the others' characters, behaviours, idiosyncrasies, thoughts, way of lives, words, wisdom, interactions, or just plain living, yet never got myself intrigue enough with my goals.

My focus is always diverted to somewhere else. There is always something more interesting, more important, more urgent, to focus on. If excuses are tangible things, I think mine would have rivaled the height of Mount KK if I were to put them all into a heap!

Yes, my failure as a person, a successful person. The inability to focus on my setting my goals, or more accurately, the fear of setting goals for fearing to fail! Coward!